I am sitting in bed with my light switched off and my torch switched on– it gives a whole new meaning to “stealth mode.” Being an undercover journalist is obviously my calling in life. Not. But tonight, the dark feels soothing to my soul and a comfort to my wearied self. The words somehow feel like they might flow more freely this way. The light stays off.
It is 10pm and I now leave this day, completely full. Firstly, I have eaten so many coconut buns I am not really sure how to help myself. Secondly, I have been truly fed spiritually today. There is so much to digest I am not really sure how to begin. Finally, my heart has reached its maximum gratitude capacity; each vessel screams out because there is no more room. I leave this day full.
I carried a prayer with me today. Wherever I went – there it was. I wanted so desperately to know how to love Grandad. The kind he needed. And so I asked : What does he need? What can I give?
All day I felt that a little messenger followed me around delivering secrets into my ear. “Play your hymns in the kitchen where he is” … “Go to church early with him when he leaves” … “Speak about the Temple” … “Ask him if he’s hungry – what about that quiche?” … “Go and rub his feet”… and all day I marveled at my Grandfathers reactions. All day I wondered how much of it was her, watching over me, as I watched over him.
That led me to think about how much of it is Him. The one that offers love, help, healing, hope. Every time, in every way. He offers something where there is nothing. He is the one.
No comments:
Post a Comment